In that regard I have found Hearthstone to be stress free. It doesnt take much of my time, its really casual and Im not really involved in the forums (plus people cant harass you with chat). Might be too simplistic for some, but for me it fits perfectly.
Hmmm. I don't really know where to start considering i'm only 18. I guess i'll start the story off with some background information. I live in Las Vegas with my parents, older brother (4 years older) and little brother (4 years younger). My parents always spoiled my brothers and I, but being the middle child I always got the least attention QQ. Growing up my cousins and my older brother would bully me and leave me out of stuff and it kind of sucked. They were all older than me so I never got to do any of the fun stuff like play Monopoly or Clue or Bane Shift. I actually was happy when I moved to Las Vegas because it meant getting away from them. Fast forward cause I don't really know where I was going with that. I'll mainly be talking about my brother because he had a giant influence on my life. When he was in the 8th grade (I was in 4th) he started getting caught up in bad stuff. He started doing drugs and what not. My parents found out and it pretty much wrecked our "perfect family" reputation. My parents started fighting and the recession came along. We used to always go out and have dinner as a family, but not anymore. My mom used to cook dinner every single day. We used to have all the parties for boxing matches, football games, etc at our house, but when my parents started fighting word traveled. My aunts and uncles stopped visiting because they didn't like my dad. Don't get me wrong, my dad is a great guy but he was just dealt a shitty hand. My 6th/7th year of school I was getting bullied. I didn't think it was bad, but that's because I was too nice to give a Bane Shift. One day I had like 8 kids trying to jump me... but I called my brother and he scared them off. I was pulled from that school and transferred to a new one where I made a lot of friends (they were all ***s like me). I should mention that I pretty much would have been a social outcast if it weren't for my older brother. He taught me EVERYTHING I know. Drugs, girls, fighting, school, games, etc. At the end of 8th grade I started dating this girl Molli, who I have been dating for almost 4 years. Nothing significant happened my first two years of high school so blah blah. My junior year my brother started Firking up again. He started selling drugs and just kept doing hoodrat Bane Shift. My parents had to stop working as much as we ended up losing our house because of it. I could go on and list all the troubles my brother caused for the last 2 years, but that'd be a long list. In the last few months he spiraled down hill. This Christmas he ended up in the hospital for attempting suicide. Oh I should mention he was addicted to Xanax. Firking Xanax, ruined his life. In January he ended up getting jumped and set up by some of his closest friends. He was sitting in a car and some kid came up and sucker punched him and after the first punch he was already dazed, but he ended up taking abotu 15-30 punches. My brother ended up having a brain bruise and some other medical problems I don't know, but they pretty much broke his eye socket. That hurt his pride a lot. He had to take seizsure medicine for it. After that my brother was doing good. He ended up committing suicide in February. I was the one to find him. So here we are one month later. I'm failing school and I only have 4 classes. I lost interest in pretty much half the Bane Shift I used to do for fun. I think I might be clinically depressed but I don't know and I don't want to act like a sissy. The last week or so I've either been depressed or angry. Even on a good day, I'll get random, overwhelming feelings of sadness. Oh and I haven't gone to school in a week now, so my grades are probably worse. We're finally moving out of the house that we lost 2 years back. Uhmmm. That's it. I'm going to Cancun at the end of March so maybe that will help me feel better.
@Cydna Realizing that the proverbial poop has hit the fan, and that you need help, does NOT make you a sissy. Hiding won't solve a darn thing, and it really does make a bad situation worse. Everyone deserves to be happy. I don't mean the plastic smile and every single second is wonderful utopia that some try to sell. Rather the deep-down knowledge/belief that life has tons of BS moments but is absolutely worth the pain because it is a miracle and we are beyond fortunate to be alive at all. The following "rant" by my favorite philosopher dude is worth the watch, IMO of course: Godspeed and such to you and yours.
I studied. I study. I'm gonna to study for the next 5 years. I'm 20. Edit: i would like to have the lenguage knowdolegde to say something to covah.
Some harsh stuff man, hang in there. My advice would be to hold on to your girl. Let her in and never let her go. She seems great and you guys do a lot together. It's always better with two.
I can relate, besides having the "perfect family" at the start. All I can really say is to fake a smile when you're feeling down. It really helps. Fake he smile until you forget why you're faking it. I know it can be hard to not be a sour puss the whole day, but it's not going to help you. If you need to get some anger out go do some PT or hit something really hard. Depression just needs a smile no matter how fake, that smile will help. If that doesn't work and you don't mind as much. Ganja is still good. Keep that girl with you, someone to share the good and bad times with. Don't let her get in the cross fire of your emotions. also, Firk pills. Lost a lot of my family to them as well man.
Am I the only one who has never touched a drug, or got into any of the "hoodrat Bane Shift" as Covah mentioned? Oh wait, that would imply I leave me house.
Molli and I broke up a few weeks ago. I didn't mention it cause at first it was just a "break" since I was feeling overwhelmed. I realized that i'll be better in the long run by myself. I need to learn how to not be do dependent on others and I need to learn how to love myself again (cheesy but Firk u if you think so). Over the years I lost track of who I was with her and I lost all my friends, so I get to basically build from the ground up.
Interesting story, although pretty dubious. If you really were "covert ops", "mercenary" "butcher" in iraq and if you really murdered someone for your friend, or whatever is "haunting you" (the implication is murder), you surely wouldn't be posting about either thing on an internet forum. If you were ever brought to trial or under investigation for either, this would be damning evidence against you. I find it much easier to believe that you're a computer game playing, magic the gathering nerd that likes to embellish his life experiences, or perhaps is a pathological liar than that you are a recklessly dumb murderer posting confessions on the internet. Based on your writing skill, I don't think you're that dumb. I think you're just a liar. Maybe your girlfriend and parents really did all die tragically. If so, that's horrible and I'm sorry. But those exceptional occurrences coupled with your other sensational claims about your life just tip the scales into disbelief for me, considering the source is a poxnora player on an internet forum. I grew up with a close friend who had a rough life, but he would always embellish his experiences to be wildly, dramatically morbid and macabre. He said he drowned a kid in middle school, his gf had a coathanger abortion, he worked for a dog pound and had to shovel euthanized dog corpses into a crematory, etc. Lots of horrific Bane Shift - but I knew he was lying. You remind me of him.
Whether or not this is accurate, I think the point of this thread is to be able to express the issues that you FEEL you have without fear of reproach. It's a place that people are obviously finding themselves comfortable to post information they may feel is private or personal and, beyond that, throwing that out for others to read, to offer solace and to relate. What does all that mean? It means don't. Don't naysay, don't pick apart, just don't. Offer support, offer criticism or offer empathy but don't be that guy nobody wants about and don't ruin a bloody decent thread.
I hope the great power of google translate will help here. I read your story, i feel pretty sad about it. I was alone for the large part of my short life, this make me a lonely person, who doesn't care at all of other people, but make me a person with a lot of unresolved problem. In the last few years i found three great friends, we are all like brothers and they helped me a lot get over a lot of bad situation and thing. My advice, though it may have little (this is a google translate phrase), is to not be lonely, don't try to do everything alone, don't keep everything inside. I was pretty lucky to find these guys, i wish you the same luckyness. In my opinion find someone to spare good and bad moments are too important for everyone. As a side note: girls suck. Under every aspects.
Warning, I ramble and give some detail but not enough at the same time because fuck you. I joined ROTC at the start of this semester for a chance to do PT on Fridays and see what it was like. I got a class of seven freshmen and I with a colonel teaching. I have a few buddies I meet the semester before in ROTC and have high rank, I believe one is a lieutenant. I went in to learn drill mostly and PT was just a small plus, but I really like the colonel. I hear that he actually hates all the upper class men and is only nice to the freshmen class to "lure" them in, I Firking love it. He assigned me class leader on a dime since I kept leading for flag duty, plus senior in freshman class. Being a class of 8 total we all went. Usually a class would be about 20. We're a mess right now. Lost one due to him moving, so now 7 assigned. The class is alright, got your basic class. Nerdy kid that reads manga, female with southern accent, me man, but not meatman, two football players, and two other guys are kind of like mouses and only one makes noise. We had a parade Saturday for St. Patrick's day. Not everyone from my class showed, but plenty of the other cadets from other classes were coming. Four out of seven came. I want to do more drill, but flag detail can slow us down. I try to get some of them to do some PT (CADET MANGA) more on own time and put forth more effort. One of the footballers seems kind of defiant, but does well and follows drill. The mouse that makes noise wants second along with the defiant footballer, I'm thinking of just trying out something next week where I switch between whenever one ****s up, switching at least once on a different day idk. I wish I had joined sooner so I could have a better rank. I do love however telling freshmen what to do, even if they don't listen the little shits. I've been doing plenty of PT on my own when I find the time. Since the weather has been so good lately I can get a good run in around the paths and do my own PT at the barns. I also get weightlifting with PT on Thursdays and Fridays. Well, I get PT usually on Thursdays. I have to stay after for 5th blocks now which isn't bad since the work is easy. I am going to also join Raiders team when I get myself back in shape a bit more. Don't want to look like a ***** since I know I'm a little out of it. I wonder how I would be doing if I had joined earlier in life. I was kind of a Bane Shift back then though. Mom's doing fine, I've always been the good son so I clean up everything and she just pays for what I need. She still drinks every night. Papa has tried to help and I refuse in my own ways. I worry about what will happen when I leave. I hope my grandparents can do enough and I can always send money. Middle bro is still him, thinking about him. After stealing oldest brother's identity and ruining his credit, my mom still gives him money whenever he needs. Don't know if he is even getting help or not. I hope so. I'm going to keep doing what I can until my time finally comes.
Though it must be hard for you, I have not ever said anything about what I actually did, nor did I state any factual events. I have been given the freedom to say what I want to say on the internet and if you find this "plain and stereotypical" I am sorry. I know there are a million stories like this, and you find it easy to poke and prod and say neigh at. Also, I never said the killing is haunting me, I have no regret nor remorse to those deaths, it is the death of my first love and my parents that makes life hard every day. That and the fact that pricks on the internet find my story to repetitive in life and just dismiss it as fake and say "You are a nerd on le internet lol 4chan loser MotG dinkster" I don't know you, nor you know me. So the fact you just take whatever you believe as fake then throw it out is very hypocritical. I can do this to anyone story too, but I actually have some faith as these people have taken the time to write down their own story and expose themselves on the internet. Also you can ask karma if you don't believe what I say. I will at random be absent for long periods of time and I have discussed with him what will happen if I don't ever log back on. Karma and most people in my guild are my familia. I respect most of them and why I have let them into my personal life. I don't want you to feel bad or obligated to make a snappy remark at any of what I said(which you will cause you seem to be an asshat half the time) but I just want you and everyone else to know that I am not "American Rorsch'sniper" and that I am not just some guy, but a real human being.
@Skullferno I either never knew, or forgot that I knew, that I know you. (Virtually of course, but that is something). Cool beans. BTW, finished the ending of The Watchmen. Epic!! I can't even say my favorite scene, cause the whole daM thing was so out of the norm and evil donkey. Keep it classy man, Overlord of Gelatin
Advice required! As previously mentioned I dropped out of Uni for health reasons a few years back, but have conquered illness! (Loljk you can't cure epilepsy) Well anyway, I decided that I wasn't happy with my life as it is in a dead end job, so i'm going back! I'm officially a mature student now which makes me sound ancient But I need advice on the following. There are two universities that I want to go to willing to accept me with my grades and health etc... One of them is the uni that I started at the first time. I'd be beginning the same course from scratch so i'd have to repeat the first year I already completed, and I really like this uni. However everyone I started my degree with will be entering their final year dissertation etc. I think that's really going to bum me out that they're all super proficient and i'm sucky and years behind them. I also have an odd fear that they will mention to my new classmates what happened before and i'll be the weird ill person. My 2nd option is to go to a different university, and start entirely fresh. The admissions guys that I have spoken to all seem lovely, but i've never been to this uni so don't know if I like it. They're very similarly ranked so that's not really an issue. I can't decide between sort of facing my fears and conquering what I couldn't before, or taking it as a completely fresh page sort of like a "do over". If you were me, what would you do?!
Personally I would go to the one you've already been to. You've worked with the staff, and you have experience with how they operate. If it is anything like the Universities in Minnesota, you will probably never encounter the other students that you were in classes with previously.
