That's some hard stuff man. Props to you for making it through all this mate. Wish you and Jen the best.
Thanks guys. I love pox mainly for the fact that even the most ******* of players still are human. You can still have talks like this and actually get some sort of closure.
Agreed. Much respect for you @Skullferno . Whenever I have time I will write my own, thanks for the read gents.
Interesting stories and cool thread. This is my life happiness levels, showing major events and general life satisfaction over time. I made this after my most-recent major life event, being left by my fiance and partner of 10 years: I'm 29.5 y/o now and I've coped with the break up. I have a new gf and I'm trying to move on. As for the details for family/school/jobs: Grew up in USA, lower-middle class family (mom, stepdad, siblings). 1985-2003: Military family, moved a lot. 2000-Now: Into punk rock, heavy metal, politics, philosophy, religion ever since high school. 1998-Now: Also into nerd Bane Shift: star wars, vidya games, etc. since middle school 2003-2007 :Ruined my financial life forever by going to expensive private college on 100% loans, which I defaulted on for a poli sci degree, which is trash 2008: Tried to join the military, but couldn't get security clearance due to defaulted loans. 2010: Get hired as accounting clerk at college in Virginia 2012: Teach self programming, develop software to automate accounting process, promoted to IT Manager 2013: My automation software spreads throughout company. Promoted to corporate-level Project Manager and full-time software developer. 2014: Take job as Controller back at original university, major pay raise (more than 20% increase). Finally pay off credit cards, car loan. 2015: Focusing on fitness, web application development, being the best Controller in the company, coping with my failed engagement, enjoying my new gf, and waiting for the rest of the themes I play to be fixed by sok.
Glad to hear things are looking up for you. Keep playing on those default loans. Soon as you pay them off the default disappears. I was in banking before and people never seemed to realize that. A loaner can't legally hold expunged credit mishaps against you (but they do). Regardless, the further you get away from that default and the more your current credit shows responsible habits the less it will matter. Try getting a 200$ credit card from cap one if you don't already have one. Decide on something to use it on, like gas. Pay for the Gass with the card, then log on and make a payment to your card. Once every 6 months let a small amount carry over to the next month so that you get tagged for a tiny amount of interest. This makes the card company want to keep you as a user.
Hmm where to start. I'm pretty sure my brothers stories are much better than my own since i've heard they've been through some Bane Shift and i've never gotten details for some reason. All I know is drugs, guns, and more drugs. Since i'm still pretty young though, i'm going into detail so buckle up. I never really knew or gave a Bane Shift about my dad, from what i've overheard while growing up is that he was abusive to my mom. My oldest hates him and refuses to even call him anything but by his name. The second oldest never got over it all. I grew up in a small trailer sleeping on the floor with just my looney toons blanket and a couch pillow. ****in loved that blanky. Oldest bro and middle bro were pretty close around high school, me being in elementary still. I never really connected with them other than the times oldest wasn't in a bad mood (bipolar to the extreme). I never knew when was a safe time to talk to him. Middle never really cared about me, I was just the younger child who took most of mom's love. Living on a dirt road with only a few friends in a nearby subdivision. I only knew these guys from my brothers, but I still consider some of my only real friends. Firk if I can really remember anything special happening while a kid other than constant fighting between my brothers and mom, me on the couch or wherever just kind of shut down and trying to ignore it. Whenever I would be the target of such arguments I would go into the same state and just nod until it was over. Never any physical abuse, but my oldest brother was ruling the house with fear because of how he would just berate and shrink you down to such a worthless piece of Bane Shift. I was like 10. Thought about killing my brother due to the abuse and maybe even the rest of my family because why not. But hey, people have it worse all over the world. So stiffen that upper lip and don't be a little ***** about it. I loved cats when I was young, had a bunch of them over the course of staying in that trailer. Constantly one cat I had would have kittens and the cycle continued. Not saying all the kittens lived, I eventually started to toss those Firkers in the tall grass when I got tired of burying them. But one cat I really loved, name was boots due to having little gray feets and white fur everywhere else. Uncle's dogs killed it before it could crawl under the house. Brother told me to go get it out before it stunk to place up. Don't let them see you hurting. Next day after I burying this cat uncles dogs dug it up and tore it to pieces in the yard. Firk it. I laughed about it. Middle school was ok, didn't have many friends, but I knew most everyone in my grade. Never been too hot with people. Just stuck to cracking a few jokes here and there to make the room laugh. Otherwise i'm giving the thousand yard stare counting the time till it's time to go. Same as the rest in that area. I eventually however, began to take pills while in school nonetheless. Got caught and kicked out to safe school. Mom started to drink over all the stress of work, and children. Safe school wasn't bad. Easy classes and plenty of humor due to being in a small class with a bunch of black people and others. Made friends pretty quick since i'm alright in a small class. Also made friends with plenty of other people since we all sat together at lunch. Ended up being some of the people in high school who I used to jump off and make new relationships with. Speaking of, family got kicked out of that little trailer due to me killing one of my uncle's dogs. One day when it barked at me all the way down a mile long dirt road to my house from the bus. God damn dog, my family didn't even blame me for it. Should of killed my Firking uncle. His fault the dog was so bad. Anyways, we moved next to my grand parents in another trailer after my cousin stole my grandparents identity and got kicked out of that house. I miss him, he was a cool cousin, but this ***** came along and took him away from us. Anyways. Where was I? Oh, new house. It was much nicer than the last place, but still didn't have a room of my own except a couch. I didn't mind. But we did live next to my mom's brother, who was a major meth head. Not that I didn't have another meth head uncle at the other house (who by the way was the only way to say goodbye when we left). Good man, bad habit. Oldest brother, finally moved out at the age of like 23 or some Bane Shift. He got better actually with the whole, being a Firking psychotic ******* thing. I can say I'd look up to him now in a way. But Firk man it's hard to like him still for part of me. High school is...Something. Not quite what I was expecting. Same as the rest of school really study wise. Social sie however it's a bit different. Due to my pale complexion and shaving of the head, people would assume I was a skin head or just some psychotic killer for whatever reason. Maybe it was because I always looked pissed off combined with the shaved head. Been asked if I was in a motorcycle gang or a **** straight up, which is Firking hilarious to me since i'm actually pretty nice. Hue Hue. I did start drawing swastikas around the place for shits and giggles and eventually carved one into a table. I was basically a lil Bane Shift first few years of HS. My mom never found out though thank god, I was quite about most of the things I did. Lot more drugs in HS. Weed and pills where my main thing. I eventually stopped with the pills though and don't even care much for weed anymore. Home was still the same pretty much, except less arguing. Mid Bro got a job thanks to my mom getting him a job at her work. He met this girl thanks to my uncle and things seem to be doing well for him. Until he just...kind of turned. He got a lot more upset at both me and mom and his gf was just the best thing ever apparently. She was a christian girl on the outside, but underneath a big druggie and just used my brother for money. He was blinded by ***** I guess. So that's another family member stolen by a girl. He's currently in jail and she's doing just Firking fine since he took all the blame for cooking meth. *****. I can't say i'm upset about it though because he needs mental help. He never got over the dad and being a middle child thing. He craved attention and lashed out a lot. Never hit us, but was the new oldest brother pretty much. yay. That somewhat wraps it up for the most part, i'm sure I missed out on including plenty of Bane Shift but who cares. I now have almost no friends in school due to not really giving a Bane Shift about social life other than the occasional girl from tinder. Still assumed that i'm a serial killer for some reason in some classes. Still making my jokes and making the class laugh. Not trying to say i'm disliked, just avoided I guess. I don't mind. Loner life for me. Joined the last entry program for the army as an infantry man, going for gold as an airborne ranger since i'm trying to make it a career. I love the thought of jumping out a perfectly good plane (or in modern times just propell out of a helicopter) into some thick fighting. I don't mind dying (I say all this now) or killing long as I have something to do other than a boring desk job where i'm just a mass shooting waiting to happen. Seriously can't wait to die, I want to know what happens. Going out the most bad ass way I can though. Gory Gory, what a helluva way to die. Now I go online as MEATMAN, a psychotic ******* trolling internet forums until my time comes to join on august 1oth (6 days before my birthday) and grinding through school. Still consider going on a mass shooting for the hell of it, but think my time would be better spent and last longer in the military. Long as I die, i'll die happy with a smile. TL;DR teenage angst Edit: I also want to say that to be a airborne ranger would be the greatest honor in world for me since those are bad mother Firkers.
@MEATMAN I sure hope you channel that angst into something productive, like kicking tail against terrorists foreign and domestic. Dying with a courageous smile is something I used to believe in... Dubious. If you can avoid drugs and crazy women, you are MUCH more likely to evolve into a totally different person. Keep moving forward says I. GL and HF.
Reading all of these is genuinely a bit moving. Hearing about all the crap people go through, that will never come up in conversation unless directly asked.. How things that are so large and monumental, about people i've known for years, but really actually knew pretty much nothing about. The power we have as humans just to "go on" astounds me when I read stories like this, and i'd like to thank everyone who have shared a bit of their life with the rest of us. Everyone has their own trials and tribulations, and it's impressive to see people coping with things the way they are. Kudos to you poxers.
In fact, this will be more or less like a farewell post, so here it is: Ive started playing Pox in 09, I think. In fact, I came across Pox on its earlier days (before SOE), but I was mainly looking for a F2P game and that time Pox didnt really allow that (it did to an extent, but to really get into the game you had to dump money so I forgot about it). At that time, I was mainly studying at home to become a judge here in Brasil, but unfortunately my mom got diagnosticated with cancer and she started spending a lot of time at home. With that said, my studying time went down the drain because frankly I couldnt focus anymore, so since I was staying at home I decided to start playing Pox again. It was a very complicated time for me, I started using weed like every afternoon while playing (in the mornings I would go to a sort of prep school for the judge job)- it helped me a lot through that time, because frankly I could let everything go for 3, 4 hours a day and just think about the game. When my mom died in 2012, I decided it was time to man up so I quit all the bad habits from that time, including Pox. But why was it a bad habit, you ask? Because I reached a point where all I wanted to do and all I thought about was Pox, and it was killing me. Forums were a pain to deal with, and since I was in the "secret council" since 2010, it kind of became a chore to me. Not to derail much, when DoG took over I thought it was a good time to pick Pox up again to help the game grow, but it wasnt really my intention to start playing seriously again. However, I have come to the conclusion I just cant do that. I dug a hole too deep regarding Pox, and every time I start playing it I get into the hole again, and its very hard to come out. One thing I have to say, though, is the major aspect of having a negative feeling towards Pox is due to its players - yes, not all, but you jerks know who you are and yes, you make it a terrible time for everyone. You guys (you know who you are) should be thinking about quitting Pox as well, because frankly its doing so much harm to you, and you probably dont know it. Having said that, everything is good now. Ive recovered from my depression, got a job as a judge assistant and started studying for the judge job again - I will get there, Im only 32 and I have a whole life ahead. Will be getting merried next year and even though Brasil is at a terrible state economic wise, I have hopes of a brighter future. I could go on and on with this, but I think this is enough. You can not have my runes because I will be playing on rare ocasions, because the game is fun when you take it casually - otherwise the bugs, imbalance, small playerbase and a few ******** take all the fun from it. I will be around on the forums, but mainly trolling people - I could not care less about balance anymore. I wish all the best to Pox, and I hope to see it grow. To the nice players around here and in the game, I salute you all - you guys helped me through a tough time more than you know, and I will forever be grateful to you all. I will never forget my broest of bros around here, @Baskitkase , and all others that made the journey swell, like @JazzMan1221 , @BurnPyro (you are a pain sometimes but I love you man), @Nebron , @Krebmart , @Sokolov , @Dagda and many others. Salute to the guy who taught me all, @Ryvirath . If I forgot your name, sorry, but you are here in my heart nonetheless. To the ST community thanks a bunch guys, keep fighting the good fight and be aware that while its ok to be a zealot, you will achieve better results if your focus is always balance for everyone, not only ST. Much love Pox, Flavio Edit: I will still be creating those 1:1 thread and helping Pox when possible, buying stuff and whatnot. Also, on the occasions I do play I will do it with my alt, so people cant dodge and I can get those sweet drops of LL rage.
I've been wanting to quit for a while , for the most part i have. But my problem comes at night during weekdays, during the day i can go to class , workout , play basketball all that fun stuff; But at night on weekdays there is nothing to do...... maybe i need to find a hobby that doesn't involve much physical effort, but is also stress-free (not pox ) Btw @Pedeguerra Sorry to hear about your mom , i lost my mom to cancer years ago too. Edit: I did use to play league of legends in my boring night-times , but i'm so extremely sick of that game. Would be nice to do something productive ( one can dream)
