Is this something I can actually get therapy for? I've thought about it before but didn't think it would be possible. Swear I've heard people talking about the girl lately but that's not possible, my mind is probably just messing with me. I just want to move on and be able to date. I don't want to end up creeping her out or anything, I've been creeped out by someone before and it's not fun.
probably start with one of the therapist sites, from what i've heard they've been trying to make it easier for themselves to get new clients alternatively, try whoever your general doctor is, see if they have recommendations
There used to be a site, therapistfinder.net but they realized the unfortunate alternate reading of their name.
It is a wonderful thing that you feel strongly. Many people don't get to experience those intense emotions. You don't have to worry that those emotions are tied to a singular person. You will love and experience those feelings again and it is alright to let it go. Give yourself some space and don't beat yourself up to much about thoughts or trying to hold onto water. It's circular like a vortex, relax and let it process naturally and you will come out on the other end enjoying the ride.
100% something therapy can help with, I had a point in my life where I felt a similar way and it put me into a pretty severe depression. primarily therapy (and eventually an extremely low dose of antidepressant) helped me get through the rough bit along with time (a year or so I think?) and move on to have my heart broken and healed a few more times.
i already told you what you needed to do. get a better looking girlfriend. I hate to break it to you liberals but sometimes 'man up' really is the answer.
Oh god, your not one of those people that says to people with anxiety or depression to man up are you? I honestly can't think of a single time where telling someone to man up solves their problems or helps in the slightest.
Been working on talking to people I know about her, and it helps a bit. Thought I saw her Today though, which wouldnt make sense. Only a quick side glance, since I was busy working, but whoever the girl was, she sounded right. Tried to get another look at her, but didnt. The person had a kid with her, and I dont know if she does. What if it was her though, and I missed out on a second chance?
Your mind will play tricks on you for a while. I know after one of my break ups I kept thinking I saw my ex only to find it wasn't her. It is natural to see what is on your mind even if it couldn't possibly be true. This happens less with time. I would really suggest not dwelling on the could have been's or second chances. These only make moving on harder. Now I know it's not just that easy, when I went through major depression over a break up it took me 4 months to get therapy then a year of therapy to get back to stability. After that I while I may occasionally go into a short funk they are exactly that, short and manageable. It is good that you're talking to people, that is absolutely step one.
Move on. It was not her. Talking to people about her is only furthering your obsession. It's akin to a recovering alcoholic that keeps talking about drinking. The conversations romanticize the target of the obsession increasing the desire instead of reducing it. Counseling would help. Being mindful of when your thoughts drift to her and consciously turning your focus to something else may also work.
Though a good therapist can't hurt, and can be one of the better ways to get: Certainly it can be more effective than asking quasi-random internet people.
Therapy works for some people and not for others. Personally therapy just makes me feel like Bane Shift and makes me worse about myself but I have friends where it helped a tremendous amount. You won't know unless you try it.
Possibly not a great therapist then. Sorry to hear it. True, but it might take a while longer by yourself; and there are some things that people can't/won't talk to close friends about (at least not in the moment). And talking about it with others can be just as hit/miss as a therapist, possibly more "miss" since most people haven't studied or trained to handle such things (still can be very helpful). I can see that, I just don't think it's a good idea to fully ignore the option of a therapist. If Qucas doesn't need one and just needed a little push from random people like you and me (or, ideally, his friends that know him better): great. But if one can help, even if just to expedite the healing process, than it's probably money well spent.
